Monday, August 3, 2009

for my husband

Every day that goes by is a day that we're closer to goodbye. You would think after all these years I would get use to being apart but how do you get use to being without the person you love the most. My heart breaks every time I think about missing him. I want him to be there to hold my hand during car rides. I want to feel his warmth when I'm falling asleep at night. I want him there to make me laugh when I'm having a bad day. I want to hear the laughter from the girls because daddy is chasing them. I want his voice to be the last thing I hear every day. I want his reassurance when I feel like I'm not doing anything right. I want him to kiss me, hug me, and tell me he loves me when I'm crying because I miss him so much. I know he second guesses himself all the time but he's my match in every way. He's the ying to my yang. He's the perfect father to our girls. He's my husband in every sense of the word. I'm so lucky, blessed, and happy to have him in my life. So in 6 days I will kiss, hug, and touch him for the last time in 4 months. When I reach for his hand, crawl into bed, hear the girls laugh, or sit alone, I will think of him.

I love you... those are the best words to describe how I feel about him. I look forward to the day I see his jet land, him walk off the plane, and I'm running into his arms. Until then, his letters, voice, and pictures will be enough.

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